Why did the boat salesman cry? Because a puppet killed his family.

How do you lose your train of thought? You can't. It is impossible to fit a full size locomotive in the human skull.

A man walks into a bar He is STD positive.

why did the man jump off the building? to commit suicide.

Q. How did the blind man savvier from walking of a cliff? A. He didn't he died.

Could switching to Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? Yes.

What did Hellen Keller name her dog? Her parents named it Spot; Hellen Keller isn't able to speak due to her handicapped muteness.

President Donald Trump

willie revilame

How do you get four gay guys to sit on a stool? Ask them kindly to do so. Their sexual orientation is of little to no importance in this situation.

Q. How are a bird and a turtle alike? A. They both fly. Except the turtle.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

Why are you so fat? Cause I eat a lot.

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

Faithful men.

How do you confuse a blonde? Speak to her in a nonsensical language of gibberish you have devised without her being able to understand or translate.

How many kids does Buzz Light Year have? To infinity and beyond!!

Rishi is a funny guy, well he thinks he is. true story.

Why was the black man sent to prison? He was wrongfully accused of a crime which is a fine example of how flawed today's justice system is.

Why was there a black guy in the back of a police car? He was caught stealing

A cannibal went for a walk and he passed his brother.

Why did the boy fail his midterm? he didnt study.

Did the boy ever tell you how he died? Trick questions he's dead, deceased bodies can't talk.

Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: I have no Idea what you would call cheese which isn't yours. However, it seems quite trivial to take time to discuss a nonsensical topic such as cheese which isn't yours.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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