Why did the girl put on make-up and perfume? Because she was ugly and smelled bad.

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nba live 13

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Q:Why do people not live forever? A: Because they die dumbass.

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why wouldnt sally stop spinning? she was trapped in a washing machine

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Why can't men give birth? Because men do not not have the reproductive organs required to give life to a new born child.

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Who won the race across the highway, the Mexican or the Frenchman? Neither, as they were struck by a mac truck when attempting to run across the highway and were both killed instantly on impact.

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How do you punish an electrician? Kill his family.

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The WNBA

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Why does it matter, they can't chuck wood in the first place.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Robin Robin Who? Robin Williams Whoa, too early bro

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What's worse than a fly in your soup? Getting killed in a plane crash.

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Fun fact: If you took the skin of an average person and laid it flat you would have enough to get a pretty serious criminal conviction, amirite?

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Where was Andy Beckett WHEN THE LIGHTS WENT OUT? In the dark

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Why did the kid give a bad presentation in class? He knew basically nothing about the topic, and on top of that had a large erection.

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Why was the boy not feeling well? He swallowed a piano.

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what happened to the boy that walked down the street he got hit by a falling street light

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What is the easiest method of making multiple women fall head over heels in your presence? Have a wingman help you raise a rope at the start of a women's running race.

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A convict escapes a prison he's been in for 15 years. He's soon tracked down by police and put back in jail where he'll serve another 2 years of jail time along with his 5 remaining years.

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Why doesn't Michael J. Fox drive a stick shift? He was raised in an urban area and was only taught to maneuver with vehicles that shifted automatically.

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After the haitian revolution, Haiti lived happily ever after, Until god smited them with a devastating natural disaster

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What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. Unless it's muscular dystrophy.

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Q: What did the black man say to his Ex wife after she placed a restraining order on him? A: nothing, he was no longer allowed contact with her of any kind and thus could not converse with her

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r jerks n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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What do you call the man who graduated medical school last in his class? Doctor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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