Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? One is a tasty Italian food the other is a respected member of society

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Why did the man go to sleep at 9:30? Because his mom told him to

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An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman notices this rather humorous cliche and proceeds to point it out, laughs are shared by all.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies " My daughter just died of leukemia."

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Do your parents know you're gay?

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Why did the guy with alzheimer's say to his wife? He can't remember.

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what did the dog say? dogs can't talk therefore he said nothing

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Why couldn't the young pirate get in to the movie? Because he wasn't old enough.

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What's larger than a grandmother clock? Plenty of things.

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot them in the head with a revolver.

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Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

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What makes fat kids laugh? Jokes.

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a man got hit by a truck in brooklyn, JK he got shot, he was in brooklyn, Duh, he stumbled out in to traffic afterwards

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You're tall.

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why did mary fall off the swing? Cause she had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? Cause she had no friends. Knock knock whos there Definately not mary !

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What did the duck get for Christmas. A potato. Not really it got nothing because it's a duck

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what the **** is wrong with kieran scotts forhead!

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Why did the black kid fail his math test? Because he had down syndrome

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Ask me if my name is Jennifer. Is your name Jennifer? No.

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Whats Something everyone has except david? Money.

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Shaniqua: Knock knock Random black guy: Who is there? Shaniqua: It's me your girlfriend I had a really nice meeting with my dick Random black guy:What?

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What has four legs, and smells when it's wet? A wet dog.

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Why did the fat chick have a camel toe? She was half camel

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Fitzsimmons. We met at your wife's work party.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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