What do you do after a murder kills your entire family? Nothing, he killed you too

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Some woman's like "Make me a sandwich!" Some guy's like "No way!" The woman says "Or I'll rape you!" "Allright. Fine with m... Wait... I thought women didn... I mean couldn.. you know.." "Rape?" "No, eat sandwiches!"

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the difference between a dead baby and an egg? Ones delicious with bacon, the others an egg.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you get pikachu on a bus? Rape his wife and point a gun to his head and tell him that he'd better get on the damn bus before you shoot him. Btw sorry if I just double posted. I am on an iPad at school.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How many beavers can you fit in one paddling pool? None; it's probably very dangerous trying

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats white and sticky and falls from the sky? The Cumming of the lord

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Luck is not real. But the dismembered body in my basement is.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did Mark get paralyzed? Because he was a famed football player that went drafted for the 1st pick but was later hit so hard that his spine com pulsed and tore

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is red and has seven dents? Snow White's Cherry.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What has four legs and one arm? An attack dog in a daycare.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why was the guy sad? His son killed himself after being constantly bullied for 6 years.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did the nerd say to the bully? Nothing. The bully killed him before he could say anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Yo mama so fat She could die any day.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

The Detroit Lions

thumb_up thumb_down -18

holy F**k someone call an ambulance!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

2 guys walk into a bar, a third guy carefully ducks under it

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait; it would be quite unsanitary to talk about my genitals in front of you.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How many Asians did it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1 Asians are just like every one else

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Whats 9 + 10? 19.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A black man rode down the street on a bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q )Why did the black man shoot the white man? A )The black man had been walking home from his weekly gospel service at the local church when suddenly the criminal had stopped him in his tracks. In a desperate attempt to save himself he seized the gun from the white man and shot him in the leg in order to defend himself. He survived.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q. What happened to the kid with 1 arm and 1 leg and 1 arm and 1 leg A. He had a seisure, then got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How do you make a plumber cry? Shit a brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

your momma so dumb she put a battery up her but and said i got the power!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops