What do you call a man with no arms? A cripple.

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hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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What does Tupac and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead but most of the people think they aren't.

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What do you get when you cross a peanut and a snake? peanutsnake

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A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

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Superman, Batman and Spiderman are all in a race. Who wins? Grow up. Superheros aren't real.

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How can you shed 10 pounds in one day? Get your legs amputed.

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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There is a new film coming out, it is a re-make of "Fatal Attraction" The only difference is, it is about two tonnes of antimatter... [L]

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How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None we have mexicans for that

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I never knew I was dyslexic. Then one day I showed up to a toga party dressed as a goat.

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The joke below is absolute shit.

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There's a car about to hit me.

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So a guy walks into a bar. He asks the woman next to him, ''Can I buy you a drink?'' The woman says,''No thank you.''

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why are black people so good at basketball? Because all they have to do is shoot, steal, and run.fctswity (sultably

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What is the hardest part about rollerblading? Most commonly the balance part.

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What's blue and says "Good morning" A blue sign that says good morning

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Ding-Dong.............no knock-knocking required

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whats worst than school? the earth exploding whats worse than the earth exploding? the sun exploding whats worse than the sun exploding? 10,000 suns exploding

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How do you stop a bus? Throw a little child in front of it. If the driver is a loaf of bread, this phrase isn't rather important.

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Why did I write this anti-joke? Because I am generally not that funny.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck at poetry, show me your tits!

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What did the blonde say to the man when he asked her what time it was? 6:34 pm

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Why was Sally crying? Because she had a frog stapled to her face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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