If a bear was mad he would be beary angry.

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What happens when Darth Vader farts? Nothing. Darth Vader's butt was burned off on the volcanic planet of Mustafar and he fell into a lava pit. Darth Vader has since started a program called Darth Vader's butt replacement research foundation. Please donate money today. You could be changing a buttless person's life. Thank you very much.

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A zebra was on his way to a water hole. On the way he met 6 giraffes. Each giraffes had 3 monkeys around their neck. Each monkey had 2 birds on their head. How many animals went to the water hole? A:One, the zebra.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Why Can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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What kind of condoms do cows use? None.

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A 12-year-old boy comes up to the Polish man and says, "I was looking in your bedroom window last night and I saw you and your wife doing it. Nyah, nyah, nyah!" The Pole answers, "You are a very rude, disrespectful, and inappropriate child. Where are your parents?"

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What do you call someone with the world biggest encyclopedia on their head? Dead.

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How did the magician make it look like there are 2 books on the table? By putting 2 books on the table

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Why cant Stevie Wonder see his friends? Because he is married.

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Why did the guy with alzheimer's say to his wife? He can't remember.

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What's larger than a grandmother clock? Plenty of things.

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What's silent but deadly? Limnic Eruption.

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Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Get a ladder from your house and kindly help him down.

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If i wanted your 2 cents i'd rob you

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What is a long boring story that no one will ever want to read? the life of Sarah Palin.

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The awkward moment when these anti jokes are NOT funny. at all.

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Why are all women bad drivers? All of them aren't.

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What did Osama bin Laden say to the Navy SEALS? Nothing. There was insufficient time to hold a conversation before they shot him in the face.

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"It's A Bird!!!" "It's A Plane!!!" "No, It's not either of those things."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was a metaphor.

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What's utter destruction but still has wheels? A car that was crushed at a junk yard, after the Bridgestone tires were removed for another car that could still use them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops