- Anti Joke

Phone rings Hello? Hi, is your refrigerator running? No, it actually broke down yesterday. Are you the repair man? Yes, the repairs will cost $400

A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street when they see an orphanage on fire. "Oh my god!" says the rabbi. "We have to save the children!" "Screw the children!" says the priest. "Out of what?" replies the rabbi.

Why did the cow say moo? Because all cows say moo

Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

Why did the fat man go to America? Because he was excited to get of work for vacation.

Knock, knock No, I do not want to hear about God.

There were 2 drunk men. Man 1:im planning to buy the world. man 2:you cant. man 1:why. man 2: cause im not gonna sell it.

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a homicidal maniac, six has every right to be afraid

Could switching to Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? Yes.

it depressed me to be diagnosed with depression

A blind man walks into a wall.

This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well crap whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

Why didn't the parakeet eat my diarrhea? I already ate it.

There was a girl who was allergic to peanuts she ate peanuts and died the next day. She got hit by a bus.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Captchas.

your mom is like a lowling ball, she likes to be fingered then thrown back into the gutter

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Justin Bieber got laid

I really might try and kill myself when I get home tonight.

How do you make a puppy stop barking? Throw a brick at it.

you know whats funny... nothing.

What is something you would not normally find in a china cabinet? Japan

Why did the girl fall off her bike? she got a fridge thrown at her

Phone rings Hello? Hi, is your refrigerator running? No, it actually broke down yesterday. Are you the repair man? Yes, the repairs will cost $400

A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street when they see an orphanage on fire. "Oh my god!" says the rabbi. "We have to save the children!" "Screw the children!" says the priest. "Out of what?" replies the rabbi.

Why did the cow say moo? Because all cows say moo

Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

Rachel not blowing Robert.

Why did the fat man go to America? Because he was excited to get of work for vacation.

Why is pi? Because circles.

Knock, knock No, I do not want to hear about God.

There were 2 drunk men. Man 1:im planning to buy the world. man 2:you cant. man 1:why. man 2: cause im not gonna sell it.

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a homicidal maniac, six has every right to be afraid

Could switching to Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? Yes.

it depressed me to be diagnosed with depression

A blind man walks into a wall.

Why didn't the parakeet eat my diarrhea? I already ate it.

There was a girl who was allergic to peanuts she ate peanuts and died the next day. She got hit by a bus.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Captchas.

your mom is like a lowling ball, she likes to be fingered then thrown back into the gutter

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Justin Bieber got laid

I really might try and kill myself when I get home tonight.

How do you make a puppy stop barking? Throw a brick at it.

you know whats funny... nothing.

What is something you would not normally find in a china cabinet? Japan

Why did the girl fall off her bike? she got a fridge thrown at her

*Phone rings* Hello? Hi, is your refrigerator running? No, it actually broke down yesterday. Are you the repair man? Yes, the repairs will cost $400

A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street when they see an orphanage on fire. "Oh my god!" says the rabbi. "We have to save the children!" "Screw the children!" says the priest. "Out of what?" replies the rabbi.

Why did the cow say moo? Because all cows say moo

Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

Rachel not blowing Robert.

Why did the fat man go to America? Because he was excited to get of work for vacation.

Why is pi? Because circles.

Knock, knock No, I do not want to hear about God.

There were 2 drunk men. Man 1:im planning to buy the world. man 2:you cant. man 1:why. man 2: cause im not gonna sell it.

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a homicidal maniac, six has every right to be afraid

Could switching to Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? Yes.

it depressed me to be diagnosed with depression

A blind man walks into a wall.

Why didn't the parakeet eat my diarrhea? I already ate it.

There was a girl who was allergic to peanuts she ate peanuts and died the next day. She got hit by a bus.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Captchas.

your mom is like a lowling ball, she likes to be fingered then thrown back into the gutter

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Phone rings Hello? Hi, is your refrigerator running? No, it actually broke down yesterday. Are you the repair man? Yes, the repairs will cost $400