What do you call a man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk? A man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

knock knock father: who's there? young man: it's I, your son. father: ....... what? young man: dad let me in, I'm sorry! father: i don't have a son.... young man: but.... i love you... father: get off my porch, my son is dead to me. (whimper, fading footsteps)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I was looking out the window on a Sunday morning. The coffee was fresh, and the air was moist. I had recieved a phone call last night on the contents of a briefcase that was to be left on my front door today. The explination was vague, and I was told to enjoy my last day. Then I died.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bucket of poop. The Mexican is a human the bucket of poop is an object filled bodily wastes.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was the kindergarten teacher crying? a child had just choked to death

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock. Who's there? Mark Mark who? Mark Jennings. Oh hey, Mark, come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Sorry not thinking here, of course I will arrive sooner, give me 20 minutes or so (got to scout the area, you never know) As for coding, there is no hidden meaning so yeah... That is probably some "Neronist" coding format I never knew of I am using so well. Cant drive like this, so I will use a cab and wait for you at the back seat or something, I will let the Taxi cab honk the numbers of code here so you can come out knowing its safe. I sincerely thought you where at the home, according to our coordinates you are... Dont tell me that bastard built some basement over there, wow! I really miss him now, if nothing else because I would have liked a wine cellar made in less than... Sorry, ill be there asap, 20 minutes or less, nah, believe me, "fancy" is the least of things I want, and I wont be changing my mind anytime soon. See ya. I am sincerely surprised you even remember me, then again I look a lot like your crush. Abel (in case you where wondering, this is not my name either, but you get the picture by now)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

a man walked into a bar ouch

thumb_up thumb_down -2

1 friend request facebook: ignore. Nuff said

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because Osama Bin Laden is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Five Mexicans were driving down the motorway in a Ford. Must've been a Fiesta.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What happened to the man who lost his left arm, left leg and eye in an accident? I expect he claimed insurance, assuming he was prudent enough to insure himself, or his workplace complied with legislation.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

When life gives you lemons... Be thankful you're not starving, a**hole.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Chuck Norris can count from 1 to 100... twice!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

James: They say attitudes are contagious. Bill: How do you know? James: My whole family caught it and they will all die within 2 weeks.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, Therefore no one knew why his name was Fuzzy Wuzzy.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How many pairings of animals did Moses collect before the rain started? 1. 500 2. 50000 3. 500000000 4. Nobody really knows 5. It was Noah... Moral: Lol.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the black man say to the young white woman during sex? you are a wonderful woman

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How many Aumish farmhands does it take to operate a state of the art commercial laser-cutter? One,provided he has the relevant training and experience.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the clown fall off the swing? He got shot.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A guy walks into a bar, A metal one, OUCH!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

if you watched wife-swap years ago, you'll remember that one family that bought anything they could because they didnt have to pay till 12-21-12 because they thought the world would end LOL FUN FAMILY NOW HUH

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops