how do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face

Why did the little boy sit next to the big boy? Because he wanted to get raped by big Jake!

A man dressed in a business suit goes into a doctor's office. He asks the receptionist how much a vasectomy would cost. After a minute of her looking it up on the computer she turns to him and says "The procedure will cost $750." He then thanks her and leaves.

you

Why did Jack got late to his date? Because he was playing Call of Duty and forgot about the time.

why did ryan go to bed? because he is a growing boy and need it to keep in line for his study's i lied about him sleeping hes dead he was abducted

I am a joke. I am funny.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

why did the plane crash? because fenton was driving it..."THE DEER HAD TO DIE"

A black man walks into a bar and says, "ouch."

A girl dropped her pencil while sitting next to her bf... She glanced at his phone while he was texting a message that said "I love you"... The girl jumped up and called him every name she could think of and left the room... The message was to his mother! She didn't listen and left him... He killed himself because she left him... She killed herself because he killed himself... Moral of the story: Don't drop you pencil!

Why did the Kitty stop meowing? Because its dead.

Whats Black and blue My wife after i beat her ass.

A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

what happens if you set micheal jackson on fire nothing he is 6 feet under incased in concrete if he wasnt hed melt

Why did Sally eat popcorn? She was watching a movie

Why did the milk man cry? Cause you killed his family.

A man laughs creepily and another man asks him what he's doing he says I have a creepy laugh so the man asks him why he was laughing the man says there's a boy over there that has a frog stapled to his face!!!!!!!!!

What did the black man say to the young white woman during sex? you are a wonderful woman

when life throws you lemons your an idiot because it wont

What do you call a black man at the front of a bus? A bus driver

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Your family is dead. Your family is dead, who? Your family is dead.

Lets go Yankees

Q: What's the capital of Ohio A: O

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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