Why did Old Man Robert fall down the stairs? Someone kicked him down. And then he died.

When is your birthday? November 13 what year? every year

Sorry I am like so fucking wasted still, I keep giggling and laughing all of the time.

Rose are red Violets are blue And I really hate you Friends?????

What's the difference between a dead baby and a dead baby joke? Dead baby jokes aren't funny.

A man walks into town and takes a shit!

A pedophile walks into a Nursery. He get's arrested.

What is the worst part about being a blonde? Random green painted strangers throw forks at you claiming it will confuse you, because they got it off of an anti joke website!

What do you get when you cross Sir Elton John with a sabertooth tiger. I don't know but you better keep it away from your ass.

what did God say when He saw a black man? Oops I urnt one.

How do you tell if a kitten is alive? Throw it at the wall.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It got shot. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

whats worse than a dead cat in your apple? a dead baby in your apple.

what did one swedish guy say to another swedish guy? I dont speak russian

A priest, a rabbi, and a monk are standing near a cliff. They say that they are of the best religion. The priest jumps off the cliff and says "God save me", he dies. The rabbi says "Allah save me", he dies. The monk says "Buddha save me" he is saved, in relief he says "Oh thank God" he dies

A guy walks into the bar and orders a coke with some ice and some peanuts. It cost a total of $4.00 plus tax. He gave the bartender $5.00 and told him to keep the change. He drank the soda pop and burped loudly and left the bar and forgot his peanuts.

What did the little boy order at Burger King? He ordered a burger and wiped his booger on the counter.

Roses are red Violets are blue Who is your daddy And what does he do?

Hey, you pee here? Yes, it's called a urinal

Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

this girl died

Nero the guy that killed four Neo Nazi`s desecrating the funeral of one of my late members in Chile with a revolver hidden in one of the 46 hidden pockets on the inside of his trench jacket with lots of folders here, inside whose only side effect is making me look like I spend a lot more time at the gym, later one of them found me, ran towards the police which laughed at him pointed at me and said: That guy with a prosthetic arm? You dont believe me... Excellent! Nero The Avenger

How did the baby cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken

Why did the girl ask for anal? She didn't. She was raped.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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