What has four legs and starts with the letter D? A cow.

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Why can't black people swim? Cause poop don't float!

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Why did the girl eat a cookie? Because cookies are good.

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can people thumb up the evil dead statment below please... its important to me. (and the cup joke below) thanks people , ur great.

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What did the cow say right before he was slaughtered and later to be sold? Nothing cows dont talk they can create a sound that most people describe as MOO though.

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what's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings what's worse than 2 bee stings? the Holocaust. what's worse than the holocaust? 3 bee stings

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Why did the rabbit fall out of the tree? because it was dead Why did the bird fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the rabbit

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whats better then a pile of dead babies? 2 piles of dead babies

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Q:Baby, baby, baby, oooh A:Thats what she said.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, suck my tip and call me Regi.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "My wife just died from pancreatic cancer."

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how many babies does it take to paint a barn? depends on how hard you can throw them

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How do you lose your train of thought? You can't. It is impossible to fit a full size locomotive in the human skull.

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why did susie fall off the swing? she had no arms and no legs. knock knock who's there? not susie

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pinky ponky went a bit wonky oh no plz dont go or i will rape you untill you know

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Why was the fat guy sad? his daughter is slowly dying of anorexia why was the fat guy sad? his daughter was raped by a giant panda bear

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Snarf Nuggets

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What does a baby sound like being cooked in the microwave. I don't know I was to busy masterbating.

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Several men are in a bar a tall white man named James orders a round of shots for all of the people they all have a fun time untill James gets into a car with Derrick who is not sober they drive right into a sick childrens hospital and cause many frantic wild fires throughout the town. They all end up in jail for an unrelated cause

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Q. How are a bird and a turtle alike? A. They both fly. Except the turtle.

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Why are you so fat? Cause I eat a lot.

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How do you get four gay guys to sit on a stool? Ask them kindly to do so. Their sexual orientation is of little to no importance in this situation.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Actually it is,how may i help you?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops