Why is Adam saying numbers? He is a maths teacher.

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How do you keep a black man out of your back yard? Tell him to go away.

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What is yellow, smooth, and dangerous? Shark-infested custard

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What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A fast car that's painted red and green...

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What do a bench and a mexican have in common? (don't worry it's not racist) You'll find both in a park. (I lied)

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A squirrel runs into a bar and out-runs the bartender to get some assorted nuts on the table then runs out of the bar

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If a tree falls in a forest and only one women is there to hear it, does i make a sound? Trick question: there's no forests in kitchens.

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what did the left nut say to the right nut? The guy above us is a real dick huh?

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Why did Suzue fall of the swing? The chain broke.

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What do you call a fat person with no friends? An individual who is over the expected weight of a person their age, who finds themselves disliked by people in their s surroundings, possibly due to their weight problem, but also it may be because of any personality defects they may have, or they simply may prefer to be alone.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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Why did Helen Keller always ride in the passenger seat? so she could SUCK THE DRIVERS D!CK!!!!!!!!!

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Knock Knock! Who's there? John Simons. This joke lacks a punchline. Yes, yes it does.

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"What happened to John after he got drunk 12 years ago"- police "I don't really don't know that question"- John Jr.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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What's worse than finding a worm in you apple? The holocaust.

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;aosughdfo

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I'm so hungry I could eat a well prepared meal!

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Why did the rabbit jump? Because that's what rabbits do.

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How do you get a blind man out of a tree? Yes.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Your Best friend. Did you forget what I looked like?

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What's worse than the holocaust? The sun exploding.

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Which is correct grammar: 'I hasn't a penis got' or 'I doesn't a penis has'? Answer: They're both wrong.

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The Pittsburgh Pirates

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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