Scenario- A wedding while skydiving. Problem- The groom lost his parachute. Question- Who stole it? Hint- The Maid of Honor didn't have one either, but he had one on his body when he hit the ground. Answer- The mailman, but he died of old age.

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What is the difference between a deer and a child in africa? Why does it matter? They're both being hunted.

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Whats worse than being a student? Being raped.

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I can't hear music. I am a sentence.

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A black guy walks into a KKK meeting. He is burnt on a cross outside his families house. They will mourn his death for years to come

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that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

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Marvin, was in the hospital on his death bed. The family called Marvin’s Preacher to be with him in his final moments. As the Preacher stood by the bed, Marvin’s condition seemed to deteriorate, and Marvin motioned for someone to quickly pass him a pen and paper. The Preacher quickly got a pen and paper and lovingly handed it to Marvin. But before he had a chance to read the note, Marvin died. The Preacher feeling that now wasn’t the right time to read it put the note in his jacket pocket. It was at the funeral while speaking that the Preacher suddenly remembered the note. Reaching deep into his pocket the Preacher said “and you know what, I suddenly remembered that right before Marvin died he handed me a note, and knowing Marvin I’m sure it was something inspiring that we can all gain from. With that introduction the Preacher ripped out the note and opened it. The note said “HEY, YOU ARE STANDING ON MY OXYGEN TUBE!”

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My favorite word starts with F and ends with U-C-K! My favorite word is FIRETRUCK! What'd you think I'd say? My favorite thing starts with P and ends with O-R-N! My favorite thing is POPCORN! What'd you think I'd say?

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The doorbell repair man.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the food source on its original side was running low, thus forcing the chicken to find other food options.

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Whats worst then listening to you girl friends problems? Nothing.

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Why did the black guy flunk out of school? Because his socio-economic conditions and his lack of support from his parents didn't provide optimal learning conditions.

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What did Obama say to Hilary? Will you be my secretary of state?

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Why did the bus crash? What, you were expecting an answer? I was asking you

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Rachel not blowing Robert.

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Why do everytime I go to toilet for number 2. I look into the toilet to see if this one's nicer than the last one.

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what did the dirty homeless girl get for Christmas -A DILDO

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I was going to tell my mom an anti-joke. Then she died.

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one time there was a fukc then it taked a shat potated pancocks cancer is fuCk 18 why did the cock cross the choad? fUcK

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house. A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why did the chicken itch it's bum? Cause it's bum was itchy

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, flotaing in the sea? Someone who will drown very soon.

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why was the girl sleeping on the ground? because she was dead

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What is the difference between a firework and a dog? One is funny to blow up and the other one is pretty lights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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