Knock Knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was a cold day

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock-knock. Who's there? Doorbell repairman. ym

thumb_up thumb_down +10

one time there was a fukc then it taked a shat potated pancocks cancer is fuCk 18 why did the cock cross the choad? fUcK

thumb_up thumb_down +10

It's easy to take part, just type your text below! no

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why do Vampires Sparkle in the Sunlight? They don't read a proper Vampire Novel and see for yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what do you call an indian dating service? you dont call it anything there all arranged marriages.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man walks into a pet store. He then says "This isn't the bar" and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

An man walked into a bar. Unbeknownst to him, the bar happened to be a having a Rave party. The man, having epilepsy, proceeded to have a seizure. Luckily, a paramedic was there and saved his life.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

There Are 2 People A lack Person And A White Person, The Black Person Looks Over At The White Person And Said, "Hi Tyrone!"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock. Who's there? .

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red Violets are blue So is your face Cuz I just gagged you

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red Violets are blue i cant ryme or spell.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Who is the fiercist Raptor of them all? Matt Daly

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A young boy walks into a bar and asks for directions or a map. The bartender takes him into a backroom and gives him a map he just happened to have. The boy continues on his way and the bartender is happy that he did a good deed.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I thought I was a bird and I could fly Gravity painfully reminded me I was only a human

thumb_up thumb_down +8

brandon ya twwat

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man sat on a chair

thumb_up thumb_down +8

XD I literally cant stop laughing XD, thats like a manly tussle would go down huh? XDXDXD Cartoon Network? Is that thing still on anywhere? You like watching cartoons? I don't mind if you do.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops