what do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' Cheese

Why did it take so long for the baby's to paint my wall? I didn't throw them hard enough.

Two cats were in a bathtub. They both, however, were uneasy the whole time, as it is common sense to know that cats do not like being in water.

ask me if im a tree! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Roses are red My name is Dave This makes no sense Microwave

Little girl and a pedofile walk into the woods at night. Little girl says, "mr pedofile im scared" pedofile responds " you think your scared? i have to walk out of here alone."

how did they guy with no legs in the wheel chair walk? he couldnt because he had no legs.

What do black people and apples have in common? They are both fruit... except for black people

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I threw a fridge at her.

"I have some good news and some bad news, which do you want to hear first?" The good news. "There is no bad news." Then what's the bad news? "There is no bad news.

A black man walks into an abbatoir.

Why w\s the English man, the French man, the German man, the Indian man, the Chinese man, the Irish man, the American man and the russian man all on a train together? They where going to the olympics.

O: How do you kill a black man? A: Shoot him

What did the white man say to the black man? Nothing. Earlier that day his vocal chords were ripped out by an angry chimpanzee. He will never speak again

Why did the man cross the road? To attend his wife's funeral.

A boy has enough money to buy an xbox and a game, but when he reaches the store he is no longer able to buy an xbox and a game, how is this possible? He didnt really have enough money to buy an xbox and a game.

Whats big, hard, and in my pants? A tumor.

If I had a gun with only 2 bullets, and was in a room with Hitler, Osama Bin Laden, and you; i would shot Hitler and Osama because they committed terrible crimes

Q: Wgat did Batman say to Robin before Robin got in the car? A: "Robin, get in the car"

what do u say when u meet somebody new hello

Why are black people ghetto? Because they are black.

what is long and bare? polonaise to the pediatric ward what is short and bald? same polonaise, 3 weeks later

Why was the blonde sent to prison? Well there could be a number of reasons, but I for one do not know this specific blonde so I can not help you.

Why is Steven so gay? Because hes actually Richard Simmons

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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