i heard something so funny it made me crap my pants you were a mistake

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do.

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How many dead babies can fit in a dead horse 11

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Billy: You're so ugly you made an onion cry! Jack: I'm rubber and you are glue, whatever you say bounces back and sticks to you. Billy was so upset at what he said and decided to leave.

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Why did the golfer wear two pair of trousers? Because he's a wanker

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Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

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whats worse than forgetting to buy cinnamon toast crunch at the grocery store? Getting beat to death with a gallon of rotten milk...

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How do u kill a mocking bird ? Stab it

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What do you call a black guy and a mexican guy running down a hill? Two good friends enjoying the countryside together.

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What's funny about the old man who got stabbed? Nothing... you're a sick person!

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Why did Jesus and his friends get crucified? So they could sing: "Always look at the bright side of life" Moral: Monty Python?

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Man: I'm just popping out to get cigarettes (He never returns.)

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Why was Osama Bin Laden killed? Because he couldn't dodge all the bullets in time

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What did the Batman say to the Joker? "I am the Batman."

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a chinese wompus came out of the basement.

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Q: Why is six afraid of seven? A: Why??? Q: Idk, thats why I asked

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Whats the difference between a black person and dirt? nothing

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Why did the woman not make her husband a sandwich? Because he died in 9/11

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What happened to Johnny when he fell of his bike? He had a seizure, went into a coma, and forced his parents to take him off life support. Happy birthday Johnny.

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Why did the yeti make an omlette? To practise making omlettes.

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A little boy and a pedafile are walking through the forest at night. The little boy says "I'm scared." The pedafile says "You're scared? I have to walk home alone."

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Q:how do confuse courtney A: give her a beer

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http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=341666429240797&set=a.102107073196735.4429.102099916530784&type=1&theater

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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