A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

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roses arent always red, they can be pink or white. violets are violet, not blue. your pretty lets have sex.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Where's Waldo? Six feet under.

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How do you stop a second date from happenin? You force a dead mouse in your date's vagina.

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Badgers are cool

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shammmm is a lesbian.

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Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

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So a Jew an Asian and a gay guy all walk into a bar... ...I lied. It was an oven.

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whats a dick a dick

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Q: How much does it cost to have 50cent and Nickleback perform together? A: 45 cents, because its 50 cents, and you get a nickle back

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Whys it so cold? Nuclear winter.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's drivers license had been revoked for all of it's DWI's.

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Seth stock has a large penis

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A homosexual walks into a church

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why hppened when the little boy failed his math test? He cut off his penis, shaved his head and hung himself

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a man walks into a bar he got hurt

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What do you call a blonde with a diploma? Dum,because blondes are still dum

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This is not an anti joke.

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"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

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Why did the banana go to the hospital? It didnt, bananas cannot speak or walk. It is a simple fact so you should know.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What do you get when you cross your eyes? A headache.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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