Whats green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A golf course

White people talk like this 'HEY' Black people talk like this 'YO' Hundreds of thousands died in the civil war.

Why did suzy not eat her breakfast? because i stapled her to the table.

knock, knock whos there the police your son was the victim of a cruel homocide

two elderly men were sitting in the sun discussing their lives. The first man says "my life was horrible as I had to walk to work uphill in the snow with no boots on a daily basis" The second man looks at the first and replies "you know why my life was horrible?.. I was born a jewish man in Germany during the second world war and was injustly judged and harrassed nearly to death on a daily basis"

what did the white singer say to the black rapper? I would like to do a song with you seeing as how we have 2 separate audience types i believe this would prove the song to be successful

knock knock. come in.

A guy walks into a toilet store and there are 3 left 1is silver 1 is wood and 1 talks he took the one that talks. the next day he is shitting and he hears the toilet "do you see what i see

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was DEAD!

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. I ate it.

Q: What is wrong on many different levels? A: Rape on an elevator.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Just kidding! Stephen Hawking doesn't drink.

What did the hooker say to her employer after 1 hour....you owe my $20

How do you make time fly? You throw a clock off a building

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in the front of his pants. He is given some very strange looks from the patrons both due to the fact that he has a steering wheel in his pants and because people wearing traditional pirate garb are a rarity.

What eats McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, annoys everyone around them, and could care less about anyone but themselves? The population of the United States.

What's worse than spending time with your girlfriend? Nothing.

Is every Voltorb a terrorist?

Hitler: Ve shud vork togeza and place stategic bombs overr your island. Castro: You are dead.

A man comes to a fork in the road. He then looks around then proceeds to pick it up, puts it in his pocket, then continues walking down the road as if nothing had happened.

what did the soccer player say when he missed a penalty? damnit.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish, who had a horrible accident with a fishing hook

Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia Roses are red

Mac: Hi, I'm a Mac! PC: And I'm a PC. Steve Jobs died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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