Why didn't the little boy believe in Santa Clause? Because' he saw his parents putting presents under the tree, and saw his over weight father eat all the cookies.

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Zach Barlow

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DONT READ THIS. YOU WILL BE KISSED ON THE NEAREST POSSIBLE FRIDAY BYrnTHE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE.TOMMOROW WILL BE THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE. NOWrnYOU'VE STARTED READING THIS. DON'T STOP. THIS IS SO FREAKY.rn1. say your name ten times.rn2.say your mom's name five times.rn3. say your crushes three timesrn4. paste this to four other groups.rnIf you do this, your crush will kiss you on the nearest Friday.rnBut if you read this and do not paste this, then yournwill have very bad luck.rnSEND THIS TO 5 GROUPS IN 143 MINUTES. WHENrnYOU'RE DONE PRESS F6 AND YOUR CRUSH'S NAME WILL APPEAR IN BIG LETTERSrnON THE SCREEN. THIS IS SO FREAKY BECAUSE IT ACTUALLY WORKSrnrnrn

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I got a dig bick. You that read wrong, You read that wrong too.

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Why are the British so uptight? I don't think they are.

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What did the white guy said to the black guy, when he stepped on his foot? Excuse me.

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What do you call a Muslim taking control of an airplane? A pilot. -Tag

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Why was little Timmy an orphan? His family were slaughtered when he was three.

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what's worse than a kitten scratching your arm? A dead baby scratching your arm...

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What's the difference between red paint and blue paint? One looks like blood and is used a lot in restaurants. The other is blue.

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What's brown and sticky? Fecal matter.

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Why did the black man rob the bank? Well..why not?

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N Porn.

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Why is it bees travel in formation, one side is longer than the other? ... There are more bees on one side

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An elephant walks into a bar..what the hell

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What's the most racist thing ever... Manhattan

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How can you put 2 elephants in a bottle without touching each other. You put an elephant between them.

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TJE ELIAS, LÄGET?

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Why did Hanna fall of the swing She had no arms or legs Knock knock Whose there Not Hanna Haha

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"Knock Knock!" "Who's Their?" "Mew" "Mew Who?" "Mew Two Stupid! Get yo Pokemon FACTS Right!" "Mew Two Proceeds to walk away in distress"

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A blonde girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter. "I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress." she says. "Come again?" says the clerk, cupping his ear. "I said 'I'LL BE BACK TOMORROW AFTERNOON TO PICK UP MY DRESS'," says the girl, this time louder.

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Why do fancy unicorns wear jackets? Because they're fancy.

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What did lady gaga call her grandpa? papaw razi. even wrote a song about him.

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How do you scare a 5 year old girl? Stick your dick out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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