Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are potentially dangerous and could cause much harm if handled without prior knowledge of how to use them.

why did sally fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock? who's there? not sally.

How much coke can Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men.

So two friends walk into a bar. One says to the bartender, "Get me a Miller Lite please." The bartender says, "Sure." The other friend says, "Get me a Cosmopolitan please." The bartender stares at him and says, "That is not the drink I was expecting you to order, but I respect your decision."

how do you fit 20 babies into a bucket? you put them into a blender. how do you get them out? chips.

What do you call a highschooler who smokes weed, shops at the mall, and has date-raped one girl so far? Popular.

A guy walks into a bar. He's thirsty and wants a beer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

What's the difference between a baseball player on the Yankees, and one on the Red Sox? One was named Jeff, the other wasn't.

Knock knock Who's there? A very long space I see what you did there

How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Generally one, however, in cases where the light fixture is unusually high, a ladder may be necessary. Some people like having a second person hold the ladder as they climb it. In this unconventional circumstance, it would take precisely two Jews to change a lightbulb. Also, Jews are bad people.

A blonde walks into a bar... Typical

whats the difference between a pair of shoes, and a computer. alot.

Q: What do you call 10 black people in the ocean? A: A family having a good time on an exciting scuba diving tour.

Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk.

Knock knock, Who's there? Jason. Jason wh-(death sound when being cut by chainsaw)

Why did Jack got late to his date? Because he was playing Call of Duty and forgot about the time.

A man with Alzheimers favorite thing to read is the first page of the antijoke book

Q: What's worse than dropping your phone in water? A: Throwing water at your phone.

What's pink and wrinkley and hangs out your pj's? Ya nanna :)

what did the shark do when he died.....

Whats the difference between a bad skydiver and a bad golfer? The bad golfer looses the game, drives home, and falls asleep. The bad skydiver dies in a terrible accident.

Why didn't the firefighter put out the fire? Because he wasn't a very good firefighter.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An Astronaut.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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