Roses are red Violets are blue I have a knife Take off your clothes

Why does Polly want a cracker? Because meth is too intense.

What did the blonde say when she tripped down the stairs? Nothing she was unconscious and had a serious concussion.

knock knock who's there police

What's the cutest thing about a redhead? I know, I couldnt think of anything either

A black man walks in to a bar, and is promptly escorted from the premises, for being under the age of 21

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms.

How do you have sex with hellen keller? Very sweetly

Do you want to hear an anti joke? No.

i'm on the sea food diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

Whats worse than 1 dead baby in a bag? Ten dead babies in one bag.

You are what you eat, so... Can we not talk about this? Cause for me it's recently been sort of sexual. ... How can it be ?.... Ohhhh, dude, that's disgusting...

Whos the best Jewish Cook? Hitler.

What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

Why does your mother not love you anymore? Because she was in a tragic car accident 5 years ago and is now deceased and is therefore incapable of love.

why did model 602734 have tests? he didn't

I'm going to Re-write History... History

An Asian woman is driving home from work. She gets in an accident and is killed instantly. Her family is traumatized.

Society has given up on chairs that spin.

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

Kerry Katona becomes independent.

Me: Hello. You: Oh, hi. Me: How are you today? You: I'm fat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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