Knock knock *runs away laughing*

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3 dogs, a blue dog, a yellow dog, and a red dog. The owner was a man named Jeff. Now the blue dog was always sad so Jeff named him blue. The yellow dog was always scared so Jeff named him yellow. Now the red dog he was red because he had red fur, so Jeff named him red. One day when Jeff was reading his newspaper, he accidentally hit his coffee and it fell on the floor. Question: What did Jeff do? I don't know.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

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Q. What's better than a breadmaker? A. A sandwhich.

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Q: What did the hobo get for his birthday? A: Older.

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What did they farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frost bite.

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Why do they call it a clock radio?... because it's both.

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THIS IS NOT SPARTA! *pulls him out of the hole*

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a red sports car? A red sports car was never a living organism.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Nancy Nancy who? Nancy.

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What did the man do after he took a bite of his pie? Chew. After that? Swallow. Then? Repeat.

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Roses are red, violets are blue and the sun is very hot

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You have 5 $1 dollar bills. Your mom rapes you and you still have 1 $5 dollar bill.

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what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

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what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

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whats small and has four hoofs? A sow

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What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

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Yo momma is so average, she has to maintain her own facebook account...

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Whats gay and smells like straight girls? An envelope.

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What is the funny thing about suicide? nothing...

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your father died

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why did the girl like d1ck? because d1ck was a nice boy

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What did the beaver say to the other beaver? Nothing because beavers are wild, indigenous species thus incapable of speech.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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