blind man walks into a . . . .. .

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What's worse than being held hostage? Waking up and finding dick your mouth

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Knock knock Who's there? The mailman The mailman who? The MAILMAN The MAILMAN who? I'm the Fu*king mailman now here's your MAIL!

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How are a grape and a duck alike? They're both purple... except for the duck.

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a black guy and a hispanic are in a car. Whos driveing? The bvlack guys mom, picking them up from a church class, and takeing them to volunteer a the local homeless shelter.

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I'm a like whore

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Why did Obama win the president election He had a greater amount of votes that Jonh mccain

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What did the child who tried to hang himself, but wasn't heavy enough to achieve breaking his neck do? Died slowly.

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what did the lawyer say to the doctor? hello.

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two men are having a conversation a third man walks what does he do? patiently waits as to not seem rude.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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what is big and white? the moon

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Are you a human?

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Your mom’s so dumb she forgot to update her WordPress installation and now she has pharmaceutical links all over her page.

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fkda

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

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Hippopatomous!

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Why did the car stop? It ran out of gas.

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Wade's the father

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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guess what what? nothing.

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I asked the librarian for a book on suicide. She said "I'm sorry we don't have those in stock." So I just hung myself.

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Why did the fox cross the road Because it didn't anticipate getting mashed by the passing lorry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops