Roses are red Violets are blue Its just a bulge I swear its not a bomb

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why was the man gay? because he likes men.

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What is worse

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What do you call a gay dinosaur? a mega sore ass

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- Mother, where's my bread? - It's in the living room.

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Q) Why did Anti-joke start this webpage? A) Probably to make people laugh. and to show some irony in a few common jokes.

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Why did John scream when he came in to his bedroom? He stepped on a nail

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OGC - tilt your head

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for nothing? black

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a man sees a monkey playing the drums at first he thought it waz the guy in the monkey suit that plays the drums but on closer inspection he sees that it is in fact a real monkey on that note he tries to befriend the monkey but the monkey soon tore the man into pieces

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Q:What's the difference between a duck? A: The higher it flies, the much.

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Two strangers are sitting at a bar having a drink. One is a young, fat, red-headed guy named Fred. The other is an elderly grey-haired man. After a while, Fred turns to the old man and awkwardly asks: "Excuse me sir would ya' mind givin me some advice? There's this girl who has sat next to me on the bus every morning for the past three months. She's the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She always smiles and winks at me. I wannna ask her on a date but every time I go to do it I freeze. I just don't know what to say. I'm sorry to bother you, but I'm falling for this girl and I don't know what in the world to do. Any tips?" The old man continues to sit quietly, slowly sipping his drink. After a while the old man looks at Fred. "Hmmm" says the old man, as he thinks over Fred's question. "What is your name son?" He asks Fred. "It's Fred sir," replies Fred. "Hmmm," the old man says again as he continues to think over Fred's question. The old man then stands up, takes out a gun, and shoots Fred in the face. Fred never saw it coming.

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T-Dog scare me

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what was sad about six black guys driving off a cliff in a cadallac? They were my friends

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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Roses are red, violets are blue my name is clearance, and i have to poo

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When god hands you lemons .. you find a new god.

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A man walks into a bar and takes his seat. After a minute, someone shouts "133!" and this is followed by a couple of slight chuckles around the room. Later, "57!" is heard from the corner, followed by harsh laughter. After a while, someone shouts "66!" which is met by an uproar of uncontrollable laughter. The man, confused by the evening's events, asks the barmam what is going on. The barman explains, every joke has been told countless times so instead of reciting them, they are numbered and people call out the numbers. The man catches on to this, and therefore shouts "453!" which is followed by a deadly silence, because no one had heard that particular joke before, so 453 was just a number to them.

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What did the man do when he saw the dog? Ran it over

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Why did the blond couldn't put a piece of meat into her mouth? Because she was vegetarian.

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how do u get a nun pregnant? dress her up as an alter boy

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how do you know your at a gay picnic. the hotdogs smell like shit.

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A man walks to a bar. He drinks too much and dies. His family is informed later that evening.

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What do we want? Chips!! When do we want them? Chips

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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