If a midget is mentally retarded and always late for work, is it okay to call him a little tardy?

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I had sex with the Earth, and out came global warming...Imagine what will happen if i had sex with Obama?

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinson's Disease which causes his hands to shake uncontrollably thus making drawing anything relatively difficult and a perfect circle impossible.

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Im getting sick of holocaust jokes cant you Nazi Annefrankly they are dumb

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Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? Everyone on board died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

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Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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Roses are red, stones are gray, this poem is obvious, YOU DONT SAY??

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What do you call a dragon that doesn't breathe fire? A Griffin.

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If John has 50 candy bars, and he eats 45, how many cadybars does John have? Diabetes, John has diabetes.

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How do you get a bunch of Pokémon onto a bus? You tell them to ride a bus

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i am predestal

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Why did an abusive childhood affect the little boy's behavior? Beats me.

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A businessman walks out of a store with his new haircut he was bald.

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Knock knock Who's there? Me. Idiot.

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What do you call a mexican sleeping in a car tired.

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Today I had sex with a married man, but thats OK he's my husband

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What's the difference between a zombie, a vampire and a werewolf? One is a zombie, one is a vampire and one is a werewolf.

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What's green, fuzzy, and would likely cause fatal harm if it were to fall on someone? A pool table.

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Small breasts.

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This guy was driving in a car with a blonde. He told her to stick her head out the window and see if the blinker worked. She stuck her head out and said, yes.

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What did the boy say after he hit his head? I just hit my head.

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Q: What's worse then stubbing your toe? A: Coming home from school and your house is burnt down and your whole family is dead.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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