Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

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What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

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Well, you need to develop a particular mindset, and while scienTITS claim that its not logical so it does not work... Well, SUGAR, thing is that the mind and emotions, cannot be explained logically either. Let me expand your mind (if I have not already) A astronomer meets up with a brain surgeon, the Astronomer says to the brain surgeon: I do not believe in god. Why? says the brain surgeon. Because I have studied most of the outer space and never found seen any trace of God.

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

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And so he penguin said, The is my most casual outfit!" HAAAW

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What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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Q: What do you say when you see your T.V. floating at night? A: That's so frickin awesome

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Why did the baby die? Because you had sex with it when it was only 1 years old.

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Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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What's worse than having a gay friend? 9/11.

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There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

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Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease

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How do you get an elephant into a freezer? You stuff him in there!!

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What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

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Q. What do you call a blonde in a library? A. Lost.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She was too tired and was afraid that if she got behind the wheel it might cause her to fall asleep at the wheel which would result in an accident.

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Roses are red My balls are blue Get off Unless You want too

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Q: Why did Sarah fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it doesn't matter, it got turned into KFC before it crossed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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