A drunkard walked into a bar, and up to the bartender. He proceeded to **** the **** until he ******. I proceeded to break down in immense frustration over censorship.

Why was the trash man feeling sad about his life? Because he had a mild case of depression to which his doctor recommended taking antidepressant pills.

School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

What's hot and cold at the same time? Hotcold.

What did little ben get for christmas? A dead grandma

What's funny about four black guys driving off a cliff in a Cadillac? They were my friends...

I know you are but what am I? Gay.

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? I don't know, he couldn't open it.

Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

Why couldn't Danny learn the alphabet? Because a man of forty was staring at him in a very peculiar way and Danny found it very difficult to concentrate.

What's the difference between a black man and a orange? One is a fruit and other isn't

What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

What do you get when you combine a baby and a chainsaw? 30 years to to life in prison.

What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff. What's green and fluffy? Green fluff. What's red and fluffy? A kitten that got hit by a truck.

What's worse than failing an exam? Failing two exams.

What did Stephen Hawking say after he scaled Mount Everest? Yay!

A black guy and a jew walk into a country club, within minutes, they are told to leave and never come back in order to avoid being contaminated by the radioactive waste left by a landfill company cutting corners in safety regulations

What do Ethiopians do on Fridays? Starve.

You tell me. I have amnesia.

what is the difference of a bag of dead babies and a trampoline? I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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