What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

Q: what's red and covers an elementary school wall? A: a red crayon

Cancer

How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

What do you call Charlie Sheen when he's on drugs? Charlie Sheen.

what does wtf stand for? what? i was asking you!

What do you get when you cross a rhino and a whale? Comment your answer:

Why was the multi-millionaire entreprenuer sad? He went bankrupt.

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

What is funny about civil and women's rights? Nothing, they are very serious matters.

Whats 9 plus 10? 19

Q:Wanna know a funny joke? A:Womens Rights

Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

Roses are blurry so is everything else I need glasses

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

what did the white singer say to the black rapper? I would like to do a song with you seeing as how we have 2 separate audience types i believe this would prove the song to be successful

A man walks into a bar with a giant banana as a head and the bartender asks why he has a giant banana as a head and the man says get me a drink and i will explain, the bartender got the man a drink and he started to explain why, so i found this real nice golden lamp and i rubbed it next thing you know this genie pops out and he said i get three wishes the first one he wishes for unlimited wealth with a snap of the genies fingers the wish came true next he wished to be the most handsome man ever with a spin and a snap the wish came true but this is where it went wrong, I said to the genie and i cant believe he got me with this one (because genies always put a twist on things) i said: i wish for my head to be a banana

What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

An asian walks into class to take a math test. He did not study and consistently misbehaves and promptly fails.

What's the best thing about twenty three year olds? there are twenty of them

What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a bmw? I don't have a bmw in my garage.

a rabbi and a priest walk into a wall

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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