Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

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A guy walks into a bar. He meets a girl and they have a great time. He calls her the next day and their relationship continues for many months. Eventually they get married and have children.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. ------ Knock Knock Whose there? Not Suzie

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Why do people make fun of Laquesha? Because she's white.

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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Why aren't fish good at telling jokes? Their neural structure isn't capable of processing languages or creating a method of communicating with humans, thus they both do not know any jokes since they are incapable of understanding the concept of humour.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long face?'. The horse does not answer as it cannot speak or even understand english. It was later destroyed by the government.

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Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

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Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

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Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

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Why didnt Jimmy go to school on Thursday? Jimmy is a vegetarian!

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knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

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pull my finger (farts)

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When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

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Why didn't the African kid eat lunch? He wasn't hungry.

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If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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knock knock come in

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What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

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A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops