A midget, a nun, and a kangaroo walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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Knock knock Fuck off!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q: Why is asprin white? A: It works.

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had a good wank over anime yesterday xoxo dylan hodge

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Finn: Jake, why can your body do all of those magical things? Jake: What do you mean? Finn: Oh never mind. And they both proceeded to enjoy a delicious breakfast.

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong WALKS on the moon. Michael Jackson rapes little boys

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Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

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What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

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Q:What happened after the snake tricked Adam and Eve into eating fruit from the tree of wisdom? A: Nothing, but the three of knowledge was a whole other story though. Moral Man.

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How do you make a clown stop laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

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Why did the penis cross the road? Because a man was humping the chicken

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golf is so gay i mean look at what they name the different clubs 3 wood 4 wood 5 wood 6 wood just give it a beat and you got a catchy song

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What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

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What's worse than seeing Charlie sheen in a Turkish bath house? Watching the direct tv commercial for the 100th time today

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Bugsys back back back again with a brand new track cumming on megs back back back with a new boxing cap cap cap, stealing millions from banks having a wank coz hes a lanky cockney mong

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your mammas so big that she needs paint rollers to put on lipstick

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What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

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Why did blonde cross the road? She needed to get to work.

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A kid who lost parents is called an orphan and a wife who lost her husband is called a widow. What do you call parents who lost their child? Free on the Weekends.

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how many people does it take to change a light bulb....... none..................its stilll bright

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops