A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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What do you do if you find blood in your poo? Stop stabbing yourself in the arse with a fork on wednesdays...

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How do you make a hobo cry? You steal his trash.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A dead panda.

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- How do you save a black man from drowning? - I don't know - Good!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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if i get 1,000 likes ill kill your hole family

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five gay guys stand in a line is it a straight line

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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why can't hellen keller drive? Because she is visually impared and there for it would not be safe for her to drive

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Why did the priest take a little boy into the back room? To talk about the boy's future.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is cartman, kyle you're a jew

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Why did the bald man die? Cancer.

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Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

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Why did the black man cry and scream? It's anybody's guess. He was having a rough day.

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(PC) Why aren't regular jokes as good as anti-jokes? Because they are worse than anti-jokes.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

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How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

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did you hear about the circus fire? it was tragic and hundreds of people were killed.

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Person 1:why did the person fart Person 2: wh.... Person 1:shut up I'm not interested any more! Btw person 2 got interrupted

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why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't he got ran over half way.

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour hot soup on his head.

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read this sentence again.

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What did a husband do when he came home to find his wife murdering their children? Nothing. There is no excuse for domestic violence.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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