Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

The First National Tree Bank just closed down. Don't worry it started a brand new branch.

What do you call a blonde driving the wrong way down the freeway? Well that depends on what her parents named her, or whether she happens to have a nickname of sorts.

What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

What do you call a Middle Eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs going down a mountain? A: As good as dead.

Why did grandma drop the dish? She had a heart attack and died, falling to the ground and thus bringing the plate with her to the floor.

What did Steven Hawking get for christmas? A bike.

Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

NO I AM NEROCHAN LEFT!

how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

What do u call a joke with no punchline? A joke with a kickline

Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

If you don`t see a banner here, it doesn`t mean it wont come back to annoy you whenever it feels like.... P.S, Advertising helps us get rich while permanently harming your ability to focus, Please be understanding! PS: Why the hell do they use capital letters after you know, Commas? its, Weird!

What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

How did the old man die? His family locked him in the basement and then burned the house

What did the man on the moon say? Nothing. He died because his supply of oxygen ran out.

Your parents shouldn't have met. I was thinking that as I contemplated suicide.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours Stolen propety....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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