Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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A dancer walks into a barre

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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Has anyone else noticed that the very least popular and the most popular anti-joke on this site are both related to the Holocaust.

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? A second one

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Why does a clown wear makeup? So you can't identify him to police after he shoves your kids in his tiny car and drives away.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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What starts with P and ends in ORN Popcorn!

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

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why did the man beat his wife? why not?

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Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer caught it.

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Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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