what did the thief say to the man that lost his car? i stole your car.

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Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

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Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? A: Fssshh

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What do you call a man with a spade on his head? Doug

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I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

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Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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CJTheBEST Sticks and stones, May break my bones, Because i have osteoperosis

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What did the plane say to the world Trade Center on 9/11? Nothing a plane is an object therefore cannot talk.

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Q: Why didn't the bunny eat the carrot? A: The bunny didn't have any carrots. Poor bunny.

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Truth is Jordan Abu aita has a hairy @ss

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your limbs scliced off with a chainsaw and being put in a cage to get mauled by a Mutant Man-eating horse.

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

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Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

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Q:What's brown and tastes like shit? A:Shit

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You know whats annoying? Steve

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what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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What did the girl tell her abusive boyfriend Girl: You broke my heart! Boyfriend: I'm gonna break your face.

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

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What did the Watermelon say to its baby? I'll SEED you later!

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I like to give help to people, expecting that they will be my slaves for life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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