people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

Why did Valter fall of the swing? Because he didn't have any arms Knock knock Whos there? Not valter

Roses are red Violets are blue Im really bad at poetry Your mums a whore

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies in a truck? A: A pile of dead babies in a truck with one alive in the middle eating his way out.

See you later... Just joke I'm blind

What do you get a man that has evreything? Aids

What was in the magical purple teapot? Two dying pelicans.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

Why did the boy have to ride the bus? Because both his parents died.

I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

Once, there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end

My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

What is the difference between a Camel And a Strawberry? A strawberry is red.

What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

Why were my arms so tired after I flew in from the coast? Because the stewardess, god rest her soul, failed to latch the door securely.

What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

Yo mama's so fat, she died of a mixture of obesity and type 1 diabetes.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? One second let me count them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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