What did the baby do when it crossed the rode? It didn't get across it got hit by a car.

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How does a cancer patient bathe? He can't because he lives in an arid climate where water is scarce.

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If John has 10 packs of beer and he drinks 8 packs,what is John left with? Morbid Obesity.

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How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

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Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

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Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

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Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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Boner

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What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

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what is fun to eat but dumb when its alive? A dumb yummy candy

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Why did hitler cause the holocaust? YOLO

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whats the hardest answer ever? The one without a question.

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

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Why did the ANTI-JOKE book cry? -It wasn't funny

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

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What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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What do you get when you throw a piano down a mine shaft? A flat minor.

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What do you call an Arabic man who crashed a plane into a business building? A careless pilot whose recklessness caused him to crash into a building. His stupidity and lack of plane control skill led to a horrible accident that involved the death of thousands of innocent people and the death of many business people's office pets.

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What do you call a over weight woman? Fat bitch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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