- Anti Joke

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, As you can tell...a lot of blood has been spilt today.

How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

What did the spider say to the lobster? Nothing, they are enemies and don't live in the same habitat.

What's brown and sticky? "A stick?" No, poo.

A woman takes a shortcut through a dark alley. She is raped, robbed, and murdered. Her family mourns her death.

What's sad about Justin bieber getting thrown off of a cliff Nothing

Some people devote their to talking in their head. Jesus christ.

Q. what did voldemort get for christmas that harry potter didnt? A. dinner with his parents

Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

what did the kid with no hair get for christmas? cancer.

Why did the Mr. bunny play the piano? - His wife Lannette was ill, and her last wish before she died was for him to.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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What did lil' Bobby get for christmas? Cancer.

A man walks into me and I say: "WATCH IT PUNK!"

How do you leave a guy in suspense ...

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it!