Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

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A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

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Why was the baby's face red? Because it was bloody.

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Rose's are red, violet's are blue. Rose's die and viloets are more purple.

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What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

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Why did Fred fall off the bike? He was a shoe.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, Who had an average-sized penis he only used during monogamous sex with his spouse.

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a duck was clearing out his apartment when he came across a rat. the rat turned into a genie. 'i will grant you 3 wishes' said the genie. 'whats the catch?' replied the duck 'can i touch your dinkle?'

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What is big, hard, and bushy? My Penis. I lied about it being bushy.

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A Black man is running down the street with a T.V. He just bought it with the money he is getting from his recent promotion to partner at a local Law firm. He is running because he had to park far away and wanted to get out of the rain.

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What did the strawberry say to the elephant? Nothing. Because it's a strawberry and strawberries can't talk.

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What would you do if your penis disintegrated? Never mate again.

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How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

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Why wasn't the black kid allowed in the school? Because it was the Southern United States in the 1930s and due to racial tensions at the time most public facilities were seperated by race.

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What did Rihanna remember when she corrected Chris Browns tweets she can't remember last thing she saw was a fist

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what do u call a lesbian dinosaur? lickalotopuss

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What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

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Why do dogs bark? Idk why? Cause there dogs

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Why dont blind people go skydiving? Because they dont live when they hit the ground

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What do you call 10 old black people in a barn? Used farm equipment

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because apples can't talk.

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Why do white people drive big trucks? 'Cause they can afford it.

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What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

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Why did the man fall on the floor? He had a heart attack.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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