how do you kill chuck norris? you dont, killing is illegal

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You know the drill, the world is not as black and white as it was before, just because we are not on the same side, does not make us enemies either. As for whatever is going on, I can assure you I had nothing to do with the fall of the first underground, and neither will I make sure whatever you scraped together, large or small falls either, I realize I should have thought this trough some more, but we had little time to act on this one.

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There was this girl who suffered for her whole life and then she died. It was very liberating.

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What's blue, orange, and silver all over? Nothing. That's a ridiculous combination of colors.

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Knock Knock. who's there? James. well use the doorbell.

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Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

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What do you get if you cross a fairy cake with some boiled parsnips? Fladgemuffin

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A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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why did the man french kiss the horse? because he was high on l.s.d and confused the horse for an attractive male because he himself was homosexual ps vagina monkeys and chili

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Where did Sudie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? Because he's dead.

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The blonde, brunette and,the red headed girls were at a store. When the blonde says......... im tired let's leave.

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Roses are bitches Violets are two, your mother is a bigger bitch then both

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What did the homeless man say to the man who gave him change? “Mmmm I sure do love pocket lint”

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

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whats the difference between the same pair of shoes? one shoe is for the left an one if for the right

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John and Marry wanted an abortion. God just laughed And Jesus was born Merry Christmas everyone!

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What's the difference between a clever trick and a computer programmer? A clever trick throws you for a loop, and a computer programmer throws you a for loop.

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Your mom's house is so old, that she has rats and other various critters such as spiders, gnats, and mosquitoes.

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What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

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Q.whats long, black and hard to cut through? A.a line at kfc!

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what did charlie sheen do when his ex wife insulted him? he horribly abused her

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Why did the sperm cross the road? It didn't, as sperm cells have tails not legs, and are therefore incapable of crossing roads.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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