Whose your daddy? Not me

What's Great and Danish? The Great Dane Kane.

Whats worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with one alive at the bottom. Whats worse than a pile of dead babies with one alive at the bottom? It having to eat its way out. Whats worse than it having to eat its way out? It comes back for seconds.

your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

whats worse than dropping your toast butter side down ? being ripped apart from the anus upwards by a large black man

what happens when you put Rihanna and Chris brown in the same room? Rihanna dies

What the small boy with no arms or legs get fro christmas???? cancer

What did the cow say to the chicken crossing the road? Moo

I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

Knock Knock. Who's there? [no one] After that day, Dave moves out of the house assuming that a ghost knocked on his door.

What do you call two black people in the same sleeping bag? A newly married couple on their camping adventure honeymoon.

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If I Had A Brick I Would Throw It At You

A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

your mother is so fat, she possesses her own orbit

Why was the truck making noises? It was backing up.

Some say Helen Keller can't write a good book. You know what she said? Nothing.

How do you make a sausage roll? Wrap some sausage meat in a pastry dough made of plain flour, water, salt and fat, and bake it in an oven.

How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!!

A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a socially responsible chicken and his family was on the other side and every day walks his ass across the street to go to work to provide for his family, unlike your dead-beat ass.

Why did the black man go to portugal? Because he was very hard working and needed a vacation.

What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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