Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

What did the dog say to the rabbit? I quite liked Prince's first album.

What happened when the man fell off the boat? He went into the water and was viciously mauled by 5 alligators then ran over by another boat.

Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

knock knock who's there? me josh! come in.

how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

Why was chuck norris the anti christ? Christianity was being threatened....

Is that a gun? Or are you forcing your boner into my back? Or is it something completely different that shares the physical characteristics of guns and boners?

Roses are grey. Violets are a different shade of grey. Let's go chase cars. -Dog

why did the baby fall down the steps? Because there was big earth quake that blocked his parents on the other side of the house, therefor leaving no one capable of getting to him befor falling

Justin Bieber

Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Nothing. She isn't supposed to chat because it's study hall and they enforce a strict "no talking" policy.

Roses are red Bob is dead My name is Dave Your a microwave

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

what did the poor guy get for christmas POVERTY

A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

Why do women have boobs? So you've got something to look at while you talk to them. That's sexist... I'm sorry.

Q: Were yyoouu talking smack about me? A: what? Q: did i studder? A:yeah you said yyoouu Q: well were ya A: no Q: oh ok.. A: k bye..

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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