How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

What did the strawberry say to the elephant? Nothing. Because it's a strawberry and strawberries can't talk.

Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

Stop driving smart cars you fags

Sometimes Jamie wishes he could be a different person. He wishes he didnt have to eat dick everynight but it was all to late. He had to take it down the throat but he enjoyed the tickle it gave him

whats on object, almost tube like that squirts thick white liquid from the top elmer's glue

You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

What did the paraplegic say when he walked? Nothing, paraplegics can't walk.

Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

I have a very serious problem with my narcolepsy. I occasionalolahdf;honainbirgnipqgierngiaqbhgpqruiph

Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

Yellow People !!

What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

What's brown and sticky? A lump of shit.

A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

What did the alcoholic tell his son? Don't do meth.

if u ever get arrested by cop, just tell the cop this: "No no officer, you got it all wrong. It was only a game. It's called RAPE."

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

ok when a fat person say he on a diet i said your on a sea food diet what evert you see you eat now get back to school John f kennedy students

Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

My closet is like the wardrobe to Narnia, accept my closet isnt a portal into a magical world.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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