How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

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swag

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Knock knock who's there? Gary Glitter ?_?

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Gregory: Hey, aren't you that pretty girl I saw from the party? Jenny: Huh? Gregory: No wait, it can't be you. Because you are WAY prettier. Jenny: Aw, that's so sweet, lemme give you my phone number. Gregory: Okay I'm ready to copy Jenny: It's 1-800-get-a-life-loser Gregory: Biitch

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Thank you Nero, this might not sound apropiate at all, but I am in love with you and have always been, and just want you to know that what I love the most about you is your spirit, your kindness, and sincerely, how you make me feel safe, I think its that you are dead honest to the point where you insult people asking for your opinion, I never had to question what you really mean or want, you just say it out loud, I love you, I realize it must be strange hearing that from someone you see as a daughter, I remember my father too well to consider you one, but I guess I always considered you a hot big brother of sorts. You are 32 huh? You always knew did you not? Why that secret of all things? Ill be arriving as soon as those trained killers of yours show by, and man are they fast and loyal, only you could inspire that love. I know your name is Nero, but I would not mind calling you Axel or at least knight, that's what you have always been for me.

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How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

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Q: what's worse then stubing yout toe? A: getting raped by godzilla

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

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In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

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How many nazis does it take to kill 1.2billion Jews? No one cares anymore it was 60 years ago \(._.\) (/._.)/

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A man fell in a hole. He's dead now...

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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What is white, average height and cannot jump as high as a black man? A fridge.

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OSS ARE RED VIOLENTS IS BLUE U BELONG THE ZOO I WILL BE THERE TO BUT LAUGHIN AT U

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An asian walks into class to take a math test. He did not study and consistently misbehaves and promptly fails.

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

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Why did the dish run away from the spoon? None of them ran neither one has legs

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What did the man say to the butterfly? To the butterfly? Nothing. He was probably talking to himself.

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wanna hear a joke? me niether.

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What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

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Knock Knock Who's there? You have AIDS.

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What is the fastest bird in air? NONE WHO NEEDS TO RIDE BIRDS WHEN YOU HAVE AIROPLANES!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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