A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

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How did the black guy get knocked out? He was hit by a fridge.

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What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

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Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

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What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

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A muslim man takes a flight to New York. He lands safely at JFK airport.

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How do you save stop your soulmate from dying of cancer? Shoot them on the head.

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Weaner

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Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Q: Billy has 47 pieces of cake, he eats 38. What does he have left? A: Diabetes

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Elise's parents have four children. The first's name is April, the second's name is May, the third's name is June. What's the fourth children's name ? July. Elise is adopted, and thus does not count.

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Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

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How do you get a person to jump off a cliff? You push them.

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What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who is driving? They take turns due to the fact it is a long trip.

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In Soviet Russia, you drive the car, fill it up with gas, and park it. Just like in America.

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When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

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A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops