Why is facebook ruining all of the world's social skills? Because Mark Zuckerberg has Asperger's.

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Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

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If your dying how would you avoid getting eaten alive by sharks or rip to shreds by a T-Rex? Fall on a sword

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Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

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What do you tell a women with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice..

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Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

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- Knock, knock. -- How many dead babies does it take to cross the street and walk into a bar? - That's an odd question to ask to a visitor. -- Your mom.

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what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

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A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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Q: How do you make Kobie Bryant cry? A: Kill his family.

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“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

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Knock, Knock Come in

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today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

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Whats white and sticky? Glue.

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What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

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(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

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Roses are red Violets are blue Everyone on antijoke that steals what I write go to hell My toaster has down syndrom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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