What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

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What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

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1 little monkey jumping on the bed, he fell off and hit his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "Your son died of a concussion."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

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Q: Why did princess Diana crops the road? A: Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt

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Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

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I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

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They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

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what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

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What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

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There's a Mexican and a black guy in a car... Who's driving? The Cop!!!

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I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

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roses are red violets are blue wanna hear a joke? WNBA....

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What happened to the black man when he was hit by a truck? He died.

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I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

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What do Barney and a butchers knife have in common? One of them is purple

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i punched my mother in the face once she cried

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from ebola

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Life is confusing. Really how so? He just walked up to me five minutes ago with a pair of socks taped on both sides of his face saying humanity is screwed and ran off after peeing on my carpet.

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Why did the water in the lake disappear? There was a toilet at the bottom.

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If little jimmy has five candy bars and he eats three, what does little jimmy have? Diabetes

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An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops