What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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why Is the teen's sock crusty? he stepped in the glue that his little sister was using for her art project.

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Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

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What happened to the girl who got an infection from an abortion? She died.

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what do you do when you see a black man punching a girl? act like you dont see it and get the hell out of harms way

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I accidentally solicited a prostitute today. I was driving in an iffy neighborhood and saw a woman on the sidewalk, so I stopped to ask if she could give me directions. She must have misheard me.

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How do you blindfold an asian? step 1: Fold your blindfold into a triangle step 2: Wrap blindfold around the head of the asian step 3: Tie the blindfold on the back of the asians head step 5: You forgot 4 step 6: Your finished step 4: Tighten the blindfold Now you know how to blindfold an asian ˜´??

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Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

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If polar bears were pink they'd be very easy to find

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Jimmy: Knock, knock, Grandmother: Who's there? Jimmy: Jimmy Grandmother: Jimmy who? And then Jimmy held back tears as he knew grandmother's Alzheimer's disease was getting worse.

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OMG I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST WEBSITE YOU SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT OMG ITS http://anti-joke.com/submit

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

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If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

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Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

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Now on breaking news!: Man found hanged upside down in a forest with 403 lethal knife-stabs in his back! Policeman: "We have concluded this is indeed the worst case of suicide ever"

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Josh brown loves Jessica Potts from Dylan xoxo

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Whats worst than a cold? Being shot in the face repeatadly by a rocket launcher until death.

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how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

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How did the little boy fall over? He was tripped up by his alcoholic father.

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Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

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What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

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i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

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Why didn't the Mexican go to college? He was caught smuggling drugs over the border and was shot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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