Is Barack Obama a dentist, a teacher, or the president of the United States? A dentist. He just happens to have the same name as the president.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why did victor have a tube on his neck he was helping james with security

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

thumb_up thumb_down +9

My Texting Convos: "Heyy!" "Hi!" "Watz up?" "nm hbu?" "Same here!" "Koolio!(: So wrud?" "Nothing. Just texting you!" "Yea! Same! I'm so bored! And tired!" "Ikr!" "Yupp!" *No one answers. When this is what you really want: "I love you soooo much!" "Awwwwh!<3 I loe you too!" "Do you wanna go out?(;" "YES!!(:" "ily<3" "iyl2<3" *convo goes on forever(: Moral: Purple tomatoes are books of yellow buttons on hands(;

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the boy fall off the purple cliff? Because someone cut of his legs and arms and threw him off.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why was Luke named Luke Skywalker? Because he walks to skies.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Reading re-posts of classic anti jokes posted by lonely teenagers.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops