How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

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Why did the boy break his leg? Because he fell off a building

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

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why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

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Dollar ice tea... I drink that Supa hot fire... i spit that Two and a half men................... I watch that

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A man works at a Doritos factory hes worked there for a few weeks and hes made the most Doritos in his line now and the head of the company gives him a promotion he now runs his own line a few months later the head of the company bob comes back to him and promoted him again to now our friend Carl is head of the Factory about two years later bob comes to Carl and hes promoted to head of the east coast he is head of 27 Factories about a decade later bob asks Carl if when he retires Carl will take over the company and he accepts bobs offer 23 years pass and bob retires Carl is the new head of the company so he is about like 65 at this point and he wants some wine so him and his buddies go for some wine Dan says Carl this lines two long so they decide to have some soda and then Jason says this lines longer then the last one so Aiden says to Carl why don't we go get some punch so they all got into line but there was no punch line a.w. j.p.

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Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

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How do you tell a crazy man that he is on fire? You're on fire.

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

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What do you call a black man, an asian man, and a white man walking down the street? 3 men walking down the street.

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

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Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so therefore i must be a pig

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A white man, a black man, and a brown man are all in an elevator. The white man laughs "this is like the start to a racist joke or something." The other two men strangle him because he is white.

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Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

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did you hear the joke about the vagina ....... you'll never get it

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What happened to the girl who got an infection from an abortion? She died.

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whats worse than the holocaust? nothing

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What did the college student do during her Spring Break in Mexico? We're not sure, she never came back.

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What do you call a black person who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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What did Santa Claus get for Christmas? Santa isn't real.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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