why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

yo momma so fat, Bob's furniture store is having a sale on wednesday at 5:00.

What do you call an old man in his underwear with a bag of pepper on his back while licking pebbles off the sidewalk? Senile.

what this: b a dead one of these: p

Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

What do you call an animal killed on the side of the road? A false accusation towards an inanimate object that has no other purpose then providing a safe and smooth ride for drives all around the world.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Half a worm... What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being Gang-raped!

What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

What's worse than having a retarded baby? Not having a baby

Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

Why did the boy cry after baseball practice? He was molested by his coach.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

A black man walks into a bank with a gun and askes where the safe is then procedes to shoots 3 white men inside of it. Everyone thanks him for stopping the armed bank robbers and he lives out the rest of his life in happiness for he is a hardworking cop and risks his life to save others.

What did Jamie get for Christmas? Nothing. Jamie is not friends with Christmas.

A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

What is green and is not grass A frogg

A blonde walks out of a hair salon She had just dyed her hair.

How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the light bulb and two to file a lawsuit.

Bang Bang Get the hell out of the house, it's on fire.

You!!!!!! Cause your whole existence is just one big joke.

Mom says my name I reply Coming.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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