And so he penguin said, The is my most casual outfit!" HAAAW

What does the kitty say to his owner? you've CAT to KITTEN right MEOW

Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

My wife's star sign was Cancer and its quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

Why was Johnny sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

How do you wake up lady gaga Set her alarm clock to an appropriate time

A man walked into a bar. He was treated at the local hospital with a minor contusion.

Why didn't the black man make it into heaven? No one did, there is no evidence supporting the existence of an afterlife.

You know you're a redneck when you come from a rural area and behave as such.

A black man, a chinese man, and a dog decide to have a race. Unfortunately, they are shot by a sniper on a roof while still in the planning stages.

A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

How do you kill a dumb blonde? Personally, I love stabbing them.

All of these jokes suck; so I just made one that equally sucks!

Q: What is Fftp poort grtz gruxxyw? A: DYSLEXIA!

A moose walks into a grocery store. He goes over to a cashier and says, "On what aisle are the potates?" The cashier replies, "Aisle 4." The moose went to aisle 4 AND THERE WERE NO POTATOES!

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he found out the oreo he slept with last night had aids and he wanted to make sure he didnt get the deadly disease so he went to the doctor to get tested.

Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

What has four legs and is always ready to travel? Siamese twin fugitives.

Why don't birds cry when they get hurt, lose a loved one, or watch opera? How the f*** should I know.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because it felt like it, now mind your own business!

A man walked up to a fork in the road. He bent down, picked it up, and continued on his journey.

Q: Why did Sarah fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

Roses are red My balls are blue Get off Unless You want too

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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