Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, It's none of my business.

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Why was the boy cold? Because he couldn't afford clothing.

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what's the difference between your grandmother and a dead squirrel? Technically, if you burn them both, your grandmother will produce more ash, but apart from that, they are both useless pieces of carbon.

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Person 1: Why does food from Subway taste so good? Person 2: I don't know, why? Person 1: Because their ingredients are fresh. Person 2: Um, OK? Person 1: Yeah, it's all under 18. Person 2: Shit...

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what do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating thats odd.

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why was the little boy crying? He had dead mice shoved up his asshole.

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

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What happens when you turn the TV on? You watch it.

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what happened to the frog that had a car accident, nothing it's dead

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Q. What is the best way to suicide? A. Kill yourself.

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Yep, super duper stressed, all of the time, but how did you know?

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Roses are red, and blood is too. But violets are purple. NOT FUCKING BLUE.

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Someone: I like my coffee like I like my men Someone else: Black? Someone: No, tied up, shoved in a burlap sack, and dragged through the mountains.

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whats black and white and black and white and black and white? a penguin rolling down a hill whats black and white and laughing? the penguin that pushed him

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If dogs hate cats and cats hate mice, than what do mice hate? Themselves.

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A black man walks into a store with a ski mask on... what does he do?? he buys skiis.

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Roses are red, violets are blue When I cut you, you bleed

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There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

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why was the postman sad? because ran over a small child with his truck

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What happened to the girl that thought she was a mermaid? She drowned, humans can't breathe under water.

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why was the cream sad? he was frozen and turned into a popular dessert

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Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops