How did little Tommy die? i pushed him into the deep end of the pool

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Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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A priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar, but they're wearing normal people clothes, so no one notices or says anything funny.

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knock knock? whose there? i dont know. i dont know who? i dont know.

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there once was a frog with no leggs

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Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

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What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

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Whats worse then dieing and going to hell? Waking up and going to school.

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What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

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What color is a red house Red What color is a blue house Blue What color is a white house White What color is a green house Clear

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Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

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Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

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Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

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Q. Why did the man get an email? A. Because he checked his inbox.

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Q: Why did the boy have blue balls? A: because the respectable girl with high self esteem refused to give him head.

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How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

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Little Johnny was walking through the park... only he had no legs. Little Johnny was raped later that day... while he bled out from him having his legs cut.

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I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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What did the man say to the tree? Nothing, he was a mime.

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What's worse than slipping on a banana peel? Amanda Todd's suicide.

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Q:What did the midget say to the toll booth operator? A: Is your family dead too?

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what's worse than waiting 45 minutes in an amusement park ride? getting your penis chopped off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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