how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? TOO FUCKING MANY

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

The camp counselor woke me up, and said that it was going to be a long week. I didn't worry though, since all weeks are 7 days long.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Now on breaking news!: Man found hanged upside down in a forest with 403 lethal knife-stabs in his back! Policeman: "We have concluded this is indeed the worst case of suicide ever"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Are tomatoes more scary than onions? No. They are not more scary than onions.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q:Why don't black people go on cruises? A:They already fell for that trick once.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock knock. Who's there? To To Who? To Whom.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: What does a giraffe say to the other giraffes? A: Nothing, giraffes do not have vocal cords and are therefore unable to make any sounds, much less speak; not to mention a giraffes brain is far to underdeveloped to talk in a spoken language.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Man goes to the doctors, He waits patiently in the waiting room for nine minutes and is then called in to see the doctor for a routine check up. After seeing the doctor he picks up his sisters kid from school and carries on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? Just in case he gets a hole in one! -LEts Go Mets P.S the comment below is also very stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What happens to a banana after it gets sunburnt? It peels.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

In the movie "Sherlock Holmes". Why is Sherlock Holmes gay???? Because he was chasing "Blackwood".

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a blackjack man driving a car? An average citizen.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you make a fake baby cry -Put batteries in it. How do you make a real baby cry? -Put batteries in it.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I took my sick iguana to the Vet. He said why did you bring him to me, a former soldier?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse then the holocaust? Stepping on a lego.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did little Sally throw a stick of butter out the window? Sally has a burning hatred for dairy products.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did one ginger say to the other We have red hair

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops