Why did Johnny disappear? He was sucked into a vacuum toilet on an air jet.

What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

Two tomatoes were crossing a road when one of them got hit by a truck. The other said, Carrot.

Q: You and a thousand other people are suddenly bursting in flames at a park, there is a big barrel of water just a few steps away from you, what do you do in order to save the people that truly matter? A: Stop drop and roll, duh!

Roses are red,Here's something new ,violets are violets,not ******* blue

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attached to a bomb filled with spoons

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

whats a bike and rhymes with mike?

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

how do u get a bonar? u look at your mum!!

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink then walks out of the bar ...

a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked

how do you confuse a blonde? ask if she wants a cake...then rape her

Why didn't Billy's parents get him any birthday presents? Billy was an accident.

Why did the little boy throw rocks at his sister? ...Because she has cancer.

once upon a time there was a chicken, it crossed a road however unlikely this chicken has become famed for its crossing and will be hailed for eternity. through the chickens actions thus the first anti joke was born

What's the difference between ?2 and and 74^3? ?-405242.585786

What did a man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Are you okay? Here, let me take you to the hospital." The woman is now healing nicely.

Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, his mouth was full of it's intestines.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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