Duck: got any grapes? Lemonade Seller: no the duck waddeld away and never came back for the guy has no grapes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

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Luke, I am your father... Uh... Okay, thats chill, so uh, is my last name Vader or somthing? No son, my name is Anakin Skyw... NOOOOOOOOOOO THATS IMPOSSIBLE!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go home and beat his wife

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How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

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why was the 6 afraid of the 7? because 7 was a registered 6 offender.

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He who laughs last gathers no moss.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a whiskey sour and a mop.

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how do you make a baby float? you take your foot off its head

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An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

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An asian walks into class to take a math test. He did not study and consistently misbehaves and promptly fails.

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did you hear about the dyslexic journalist? he employed an assistant to double check his work. They worked really well together.

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Kids, your mother and I thought we should tell you this now... You know our dog sparky? Well he... was actually Osama bin Laden and is now dead!

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In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? The bench can support a family of 4?

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bike? I don't enjoy riding bikes.

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Why don't flowers bite you when you pick them? Cuz they don't have a brain.

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Texas! You are doing it the wrong way! Learn from Hitler, gas is cheaper.

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How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

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Three Black men smash windows to enter a house. They're firemen and are rescuing a young child...

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What's the difference between my dog and my wife? I respect my dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops