I think everybody should have a penis.

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Why didn't the black boy get any presents from Santa? Because he isn't real.

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Why are humans and squirrels the same? They both live in trees except for the human

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What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean? Sploosh

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesnt scream when you put it in the oven!

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How do you kill a Jewish person? Like any other person, they are like any other person of any race and religion.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a pop because he was a designated driver

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Why was the woman on video chat? She was videochatting with her husband, he was out of town.

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

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Why did the chicken cross the road To walk back

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Who's Juan? DIS ONE

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A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

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what happened to the chicken who crossed the road he didn't realize that the light was green

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why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

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whats long and hard and full of seamen a penis

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Why would Jesse Ziegenbein and Terran Hansen make a good couple? Because they both smell like shit and are fat as hell

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What do you get when you cross the motorway with a lottery ticket? You get knocked down and killed.

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Nebraska the farmland its the only place for me!! I love the corn and the corn loves me!! I live for the corn and the corn lives for me!!

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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What did the psychiatrist say to the man wearing nothing but Saran Wrap? - "That's for food. You should wear clothes instead."

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Why did the black person jump the fences? because he was in a relay race.

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops