whats worse than walking in to the doctors office and he says you got aids heaps of stuff can be worse but haha you got aids

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Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Did you know? that if you were to stretch out all your organs to see how far theyd stretch? youd die.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? Well, the difference is quite obvious. one's a car, the other's a dead baby.

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why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

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What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

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What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because pterodactyls along with all other dinosaurs have been extinct for millions of years.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? If you don't know the answer by now, there's something wrong with you.

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How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

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Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

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Whats worse than going to jail for the rest of your life? Going to jail naked for the rest of your life.

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Whats the difference between a black guy at the beach, and a black guy at the zoo? One is at the beach, and one is at the zoo.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

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No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Fire extinguisher? One puts out a fire the other one fuels it.

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I'm Polish.

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

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What happened when the man fell off the boat? He went into the water and was viciously mauled by 5 alligators then ran over by another boat.

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Why was Jimmy sad he couldn't play the Playstation? He didnt have one

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Twelve billion Nero, you puppy dog you hot blooded latino man. Why cant I control it myself?

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Whats really ugly and horny Jake's mom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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