5 blondes walk into a bar They all leave very intoxicated and die in a car accident shortly after.

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Q. Whats red and smells like blue paint? A. Wheres my tractor?

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why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

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Why can't Scrillex fish? Because He is too busy to practice fishing.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What do you call an animal killed on the side of the road? A false accusation towards an inanimate object that has no other purpose then providing a safe and smooth ride for drives all around the world.

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Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

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yo momma so fat, Bob's furniture store is having a sale on wednesday at 5:00.

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What did Rebecka black say on Thursday? Today is thursday.

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How can you finally get your girlfriend to scream in the bedroom? Store the bodies there.

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What do you call a black midget in space? The first true example of how hard work, dedication and sacrifice can help you to achieve your goals.

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How do you get your lawyer to shut up. Hit him with a bat.

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Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

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What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

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why did the baby die? It was hit by a bus and then raped by a seal.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He was perfectly happy where he was.

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Yo momma so stupid, she had you.

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

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Why was the man sad He wasnt i lied

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What rude names do you call a girl with no limbs? Anything you want they can't touch you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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