The blond detective was searching a crime scene and replied to the police officer, "I smell something fishy about this situation." She was on her period as a matter of fact, and bled all over her trousers.

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Don't quote me on this Nero, but she kinda deserves it, she should know better, its not like you have gotten this far by not knowing your limits, even if you tend to break them way too often. Can you get rid of the hallucinations with your mind alone? If not get to sleep asap! And stay asleep for a month or so, and if they somehow cant feed your system intravenously, they can all get the fuck out of there.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

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When the going gets tough... Commit suicide.

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What color is the grass on Bob's lawn? Bob lives in a apartment.

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Q: What's worse? Inhaling fly spray or deodorant? A: The Holocaust

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock? Who's There? Not Suzy. What did Suzy want for Christmas? Parents who loved her. What did Suzy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Where's Wally? In a children's book.

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Roses are bitches Violets are two, your mother is a bigger bitch then both

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Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? Because it could see and hear.

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What starts with P and ends with ORN? Popcorn! What starts with F and ends with UCK? Firetruck! What starts with S and ends with EX? Spandex!

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Why didn't the cat have any legs? Because it was a snake

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What's better than your first Hanukkah? Not being a Jew.

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What did the man say to his wife. Hi

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What do you call a middle ages man driving a van filled with children? Coach.

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are about to be executed by a firing squad. Before they shoot the brunette, they ask if she was any last words. “Look, a tornado!” Then they shoot her.

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Its a bird!! Its a plane!! No, its a bird.

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what do you get when you you put a knife in a head? a dead body

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Knock Knock? Come in.

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Yo mama so fat.

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Parents who drive with children on their lap should be wrapped with a huge diapper

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How do you scare a plumber? Kill his family.

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Whats worse than getting an eye gouged out? Getting both eyes gouged out?

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Mary had a little lamb And a side of fries.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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