Modern math questions: If I have 9 apples and you have 12 ice cubes, his many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? - Probably about 5 or 6, depending on the car.

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm colorblind.

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Why would Jesse Ziegenbein and Terran Hansen make a good couple? Because they both smell like shit and are fat as hell

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Have u seen stevie wonders new house? No. Niether has he

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What's hotter than a woman who is face down and ass up? A woman who isn't tying her shoes.

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Whats a six letter name for black people? Friend.

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five gay guys stand in a line is it a straight line

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Obama One Big Ass Mistake America

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Roses are blue Violets are polka dot I suck at rhyming Pandas

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life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

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How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb? None, any dog aware of the situation would kindly inform its owner.

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A man is at the doctor's waiting to be examined. The doctor walks into the room and takes one look at the man. The Doctor says, "You will need to stop masturbating." The man looks at him and says, "What, why?" The doctor says, "so that I can examine you"

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A guy forgot his 20th wedding anniversary. His wife was really mad, and said that she better have something in the driveway that goes from 0 to 350 in 10 seconds, and he quickly pulled out an AK-47 and murdered her violently.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is promptly arrested for sexual harassment.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a serial-rapist with links to the Black Dragon triad. Yee.

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What's worse than being hit with a falling brick? Being hit with many falling bricks. -ilikecrepes97

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A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike they both taste good

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Me: Wanna play a game of red light and as I get closer to you, you get to call red light?? girl: Yea! okay, go! girl: green light!! Me: Sorry, firetrucks don't stop for red lights

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Knock knock? Who's there? You have cancer.

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a guy walks into a bar.. ouch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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