Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

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Anti-Joke is a knock-off.

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Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

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What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

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Q- if a small quiz is a quizicle then whats a small test A- a testicle

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What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

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What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he...

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Roses are red Bob is dead My name is Dave Your a microwave

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Roses are red Violets are Blue Let's just screw

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It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

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If God created the world, including man kind, why do we worship him? We are corrupt, selfcentered, animal slaughterers. He made us this. So, Why?

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Q:Wanna know a funny joke? A:Womens Rights

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Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

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What's the difference between a black person and a pizza? Pizza is a type of food.

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A nun walks into a bar. She is immediately excommunicated.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, my dick is hard, and it's cumming for you.

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"Hey, did you hear that the Dungbeetles got a divorce? They live in California so she got half his shit."

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man i a gorilla suit with a banana.

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What do you get if you cross a fairy cake with some boiled parsnips? Fladgemuffin

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I ran out of anti-jokes. However, here's a cool math puzzle. 492 357 816 Using every number from 1-9, each row added up equals to 15, horizontally, vertically, and diagonally. Here's another cool word play TEA URN BAY Words horizontally are Tea, Urn, Bay Words vertically are Tub, Era, Any Words diagonally are Try, Bra

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A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father shits on his desk.

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An Australian man walking in Manhattan is approached by another man who pulls out a switchblade and says, "give me your wallet or I'll stab you with this knife!" The Australian man hands over his wallet. A nearby police officer witnesses this the last moment of the mugging, arrests the criminal and returns the Australian's belongings.

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What's wrong with black people? They tend to make mistakes, as do all humans

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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