a fat kid walked up to me today at school and claimed he could do more pull ups than i. i found this very funny because i have known this boy since i was two months old, and he witnessed the day where i lost both of my arms to cancer.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a bmw? I don't have a bmw in my garage.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is not a sentient animal and is unaware of the dangers it will face.

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I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

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I like my coffee like I like my slaves... Free

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What did the black kid say to the white kid My parents are slaves

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

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What did the librarian say to the rude man who was talking very loudly? The librarian said "shhh keep it down."

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Yo mamas so fat she hates her life and the example she sets for her children.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Blanket Blanket who? Blanket, son of deceased recording artist Michael Jackson. Ever since his father died there has been so much stress in the family that he could not handle it. He ran away and is now seeking shelter and grief council.

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A devout Islamic man walks into a weapons of mass destruction store he is shocked and appalled at how easily such dangerous weapons can be bought.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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What did one butthole say to the other butthole? I'm actually not sure. I wasn't there when he said it.

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what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

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Paper or plastic? Yes...

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What do you call a black salesman? A salesman, you racist.

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Q. Why did the lotion soothe the person's skin? A. Because its ingredients were selected because of their propensity to soothe skin.

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Q: What do you get when you get a bunch of people who confuse dark humor for anti humor? A: This website.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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