what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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AIDS is not a lifestyle it's a choice - and you chose wrong.

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wow, that guy is such a buzz-kill. worse than Buzz Killington!

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When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

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What is a gremlin's favorite snack? Gremlins aren't real.

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Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

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what happened when a chicken laid an egg? it died

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what do you call a door made of steel? a steel door

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Why did the black man drown? Because he grew up in a poor neighborhood, where no one had a pool, and so he never learned how to swim

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari. I don't have a ferrari in my garage

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took my chevy to the levy but the levy was dry

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

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Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

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Call me for a good time! 402-805-2412, I do anal!;) -Martini Wyant

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One day Jesus said to John, " come forth and recieve everlasting life." Sadly John came in fifth and won a toaster.

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Did you hear the one about the spoon and the dis running away while the cow jumped over the moon, IMPOSSIBLE! eating material such as the spoon and dish are inanimate objects, and cows cant jump for they weigh from 600 to 1000 lbs.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew. The pizza doesn't scream in the fire

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A deaf man is listening to the radio. Think about it.

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why did the man choke at the lunch table. Police there is a banana attacking me what should I do?

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My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. I guess I make a good milkshake.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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what did the man say to his cat? sex. -teagan doherty

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Why was the black man running? He has to stay fit for the army.

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Some say Helen Keller can't write a good book. You know what she said? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops