Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, As you can tell...a lot of blood has been spilt today.

How do you leave a guy in suspense ...

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

Why did Hitler kill himself? He realized what he'd gotten himself into and became severely depressed

69...you know how awkward this is now...

Emily Scarpello...Fat Couch

i've got a little something for you. in fact it's so small you can't see it. it's called spermatazoa

Why did the cop pull over the car full of black people? Because, they were going 65 in a 35 mile per hour speed limit zone, Which is against the law.

Whats from Hattersley? Someone who lives in Hattersley.

What do you call a man with a spade stuck in his head? An ambulance, he may be in need of urgent medical assistance

A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple Finding half a worm in your apple .....

A man asked a horse "Why such a long face?" The Horse replies "My entire family just died in a plane crash."

Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

What happened to the gun that was jammed? It didn't shoot.

Blacks

What do you call a rapist who uses condoms and excessive lubricant? A Rapist.

Q. what did voldemort get for christmas that harry potter didnt? A. dinner with his parents

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...