if you don't like this you're gay

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Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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What are annoying? Ads.

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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why did jim die? he had cancer why did jim have no hair? it started to fall out when he was 20 and now he is bald at 30 years old

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why does the pie have apples in it? it was apple pie.

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how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

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A man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor says, "I have some bad news, and some worse news. The bad news is you have alzheimer's. The worse news is you have cancer." The man breaks down in tears, realizing that his life as he knew it is over, and recognizing the horrible burden he is about to become on his family, both financially and emotionally.

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Two Guys Walk into a bar, you would think one of them would've seen it

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Why didn't the man walk done the stairs? Because he had no legs

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 went to a house party. 7 was there. 7 and 6 kind of new each other. They went to the same school, but weren`t really friends. All night 7 was giving 6 strange looks. 6 started feeling uneasy, so he left the party early. When 6 got in his car 7 was inside waiting for him and pulled out a gun. Luckily 6 got away from 7 safely, but has been scared of him ever since.

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What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

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Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

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Poker face

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Why did a black person beat a white person in a race? The white person was hindered because a polar bear was biting their leg the entire time.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure

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What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

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What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

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why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

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How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

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I have CDO it's like OCD but in the right order

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If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

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why did the girl fall off the swing? because someone threw a fridge at her.

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If you're American outside of the bathroom, then what are you inside the bathroom? An American inside of a bathroom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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